Not even you!
Who are you? You’re the wife. The child(ren). The job and employer. The church and pastor. Why, you are the very essence of life and even this cannot get in the way. My father asked me once to explain to him what an addiction is like. I thought and this is what I came up with:
You are driving from somewhere and getting the urge to use the bathroom and now kicking yourself because where you left an hour ago had a perfectly good bathroom but you thought you’d be able to make it home. What you didn’t anticipate was the traffic, and your body’s flow is not caring your car is not moving and going as fast as it is able. All you can think of is one thing: “I gotta get to the bathroom.”
Finally, the roadblock is now behind you and you are moving faster than the speed limit. Normally you are careful of traffic laws and seldom even think to not come to a full stop or get through the amber light while turning red. But now, you don’t care. Why? “I gotta get to the bathroom.”
What should have taken 20 minutes is now closing in on an hour and a half. You’re approaching your street and it seems, NOW, the closer you get home the more urgent is your need to do what? “I gotta get to the bathroom!”
You screech your tires in the driveway, shove the car into park, leave the car running as you exit the car, running to the door, forgetting the key for the house door is the same auto-ring, so you dash back, snatch the keys out of the ignition, fumbling and dropping them once while trying to insert the key. It seems your vision is even fading and can’t lock on what you are wanting, needing, to do. Why? “I gotta get to the bathroom!”
Now, I don’t know if women go through this, but I’ll share from a male’s perspective. You dash for the nearest bathroom, doing a little dance in front of the toilet when the zipper chooses to get caught and you’re almost wanting to rip through the fabric, and you feel a small trickle down your leg, and then, and then, and then, your head goes back as the stream flows forth, bringing total ecstasy, satisfaction and fulfilment. Why? “You finally got to the bathroom.”
This is typical of what an addiction is. You will break all kinds of laws to get what you want and return to your safe place to use. You will ignore family, friends, children and even the loyal, beloved dog who waits diligently at the door for your arrival, which, by the way, you nearly stepped on in your madness to get to the bathroom. Nothing else matters except what is happening right now: relief.
Friends, if you KNOW you have a loved one who is addicted to the Internet and/or Facebook, you DO NOT want to get in their way. All addictions have their life-span, some figuratively and sadly some literally, but to make an intervention where it is not wanted or desire is only putting yourself at risk because the addict will do what an addict will do, even cut you off. Understand, it is the addiction talking, acting and living and the person is locked inside, in pain, shame, frustration, disgust and sad, but he/she is in there and wanting to change, but just not at this moment.
A key point you should remember. As the guy trying to get to the bathroom will have only one goal in mind, so is the Internet/Facebook addict. The faster you let the person have their way, the sooner they’ll reach bottom and recovery will begin.
DO NOT GET IN THE WAY!