While being, “out there”, I am certain there were many times when you had a moment of peace you wished you could just stop to enjoy. Stop the foolishness, the pain and the hurting. The hurting of others as well as yourself, you wished it would just stop. Being tired of staying up all night and day, not eating or drinking properly and wondered why your body didn’t give up and just stop. Like the “energizer bunny” you kept going and going and going… And now you are in a place of refuge it may seem your mind won’t stop thinking about what you did. If you are not daydreaming about it you are dreaming about it during your sleep. It seems nothing will stop it, the using.
Remember this: everything must end. For some it will take longer than others but be assured, everything does have an ending. I promise, if you just will hold on, you, too, will come to see I am right. Those thoughts will stop. Those dreams will stop. You will begin anew and have different thoughts and dreams. Your life will never have to return to what you once knew and you will be happy. Happy sounds so much like a child’s word, but this is how simple it will be. You will literally be “happy” about how things are turning out for you instead of how they were going before; and incidentally, people will be happy for you. Even God Himself will be happy with you.
Stopping comes with assistance from God. You have long filled your mind with things which have become a part of you, but it doesn’t have to remain. It’s probably akin to those who are impaled with something, like falling on a fence. I often wondered why those who assisted didn’t just pull the impaling instrument out of the person instead of calling for assistance. It is because once impaled, sometimes the instrument is in fact protecting although hurting and to just rip it out will cause more damage. God will slowly bring your recovery about so you are not hurt even more in the process. But rest assured, everything does stop.
God knows what He is doing to bring about a total and complete Recovery in your life.