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…I heard those fateful words, “Roy, you are no longer an employee of the IBM Corporation.”  (May 23, 1991) Almost twenty years of my goal of working there thirty years became no longer possible.  I would from this point on know what God’s “permissible” will was for me because I had stepped outside His “divine” will.  Although looking back, I don’t regret it anymore because I have come to know God and this experience has drawn me closer to Him, so ultimately, I am thankful; but, it could have happened without this experience of going through substance abuse.

At the time of writing this paragraph, I have spent almost equal amount of years out of IBM as I was an employee.  I have friends who started roughly about the same time who are considering retiring or due to the economy have been forced out and they’re now faced with fears of wondering how to live.  I don’t have that fear anymore because I have seen what God is capable of doing.  Everyday He’s had to take care of my life and He’s done a remarkable job.  Instead of me relying on “Mother” (IBM), I’ve come to depend upon Father (God) and I would have it no other way today.  So, if it took being removed from that which would have been a crutch and to learn how to truly live in a real world, then fine.  Also, I was bored where I was and not fulfilled.  What I am doing now is fulfilling and I’m happier.

Interesting all of the tools I learned to make my life worthwhile were a direct result of what occurred after IBM.  So, in actuality, all I learned which was meaningful happened after being dismissed.  All IBM did was give me a paycheck.  Now, that is so sad.


One day we will know the reason for it all, but if it happened to draw me closer to salvation, then it was worth it.