We “know” about substance abuse and addictions. We know it because we lived it. No one has to tell us, or can tell us, what we know very well. We are the authority in this. It amazes me those who have never picked up a pipe or bottle think they can give me what I need to make it through this. They have “theory”. We have experience. There is a difference which cannot be compared.
Equally amazing is when I, we, have this thought to just return for a moment. We don’t intend to stay long, just long enough to “hit it and quit it”, as the saying goes. Because we are the “experts” in our field of addiction, why is it we think we can fool ourselves into thinking we can have substances to serve our purposes? Why is it we think we can go, “out there” one more time and it not have a lasting effect on us—this time? We should know better and we do, so why do we think like this, at times?
We have to remember it is not “us” who puts these thoughts into our minds. It is the Devil, Lucifer, the Enemy, Ol’ Slew-foot as I chose to call him. We need to begin thinking separation between him and ourselves and recognize when those thoughts come, it is “him” which is trying to get us enslaved again. You remember how terrible it was, “out there” so what is the glamour in returning? Certainly NOTHING.
Do not fall under the misconception whatever you do, one more time, will not be unnoticed, unpunished or forgotten. You still remember the last time you were, “out there”, so why create another one?
It will be a different dealer, a different substance, a different place. The only consistent part of the equation is, is it a different person? It should be.